


Letters to Teacher

by crowleyhasfeels



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Castiel/Dean Winchester First Time, M/M, Student Castiel, Teacher Dean Winchester, Teacher-Student Relationship, Underage Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-19
Updated: 2018-10-29
Packaged: 2019-08-04 05:36:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,357
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16340759
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crowleyhasfeels/pseuds/crowleyhasfeels
Summary: Dean Winchester is grading papers one night when he finds a note stashed between the papers. At first, he doesn't understand, but when he learns it is about him, he becomes curious. Who is this student that seems to have a thing for him and will it destroy all that he has worked for if he finds out?





	1. Possessions

After three years of teaching at Westfield High School, Dean felt that he would grow tired of reading the same papers repeatedly; however, that was not the case. Dean always found reading over his student's papers to be intriguing. The students didn’t seem to realize that when you write a paper, more so when it’s based on something you care about, you put yourself into the paper. He had learned more about his students by reading their works than he had by talking to them and observing them in their day to day lives during his class and around the school. 

Today was no different. Until he got halfway through the stack. 

The assignment had been to write about a possession that you have. Explain it in great detail. Dean wanted to be able to see the item, smell the item if he could. He wanted to feel why it was of such importance to them. But when he got toward the middle of the stack, one paper stood out to him. Firstly, it was in cursive. No one wrote their papers in cursive anymore. Secondly, it did not have a name or a title on it. 

  
At first, Dean thought that maybe someone had accidentally turned in something that was not his assignment. That is until he started reading it. 

_ Sometimes, life puts you in possession of something you did not ask for. It is something that can be wonderful at times but can also pull you down so low you feel you will never be able to get up again. At times, you wish that you didn’t have it, that you could toss it aside and never have to worry about it again. But this thing is part of who you are. Without it, you would die. Does that mean that I am dying? _

_ This possession that came to be the most important possession I would ever have, no longer belongs to me. I no longer control how it works. I used to be able to think it into doing whatever I willed, beyond its basic functions, but it has broken free. It has chosen to become something more than solely my possession. It has become your possession as well Mr. Winchester. So, if you don’t mind, I would really like for you to give it back. _

“What the?” Dean muttered under his breath.

Dean read over the paper a few more times before setting it down and leaning back in his chair. What did he possess that this student was talking about? He had an idea but he did not want to jump to conclusions. Also, who wrote this? Dean shuffled through the rest of the papers, trying to match the handwriting to one of the students. None of them seemed to match. 

Dean set the paper aside and went back to the other papers, needing to focus on something else for a while. By the time seven rolled around, Dean decided to stop for the night and get something to eat before calling it a night. He set his papers into graded and ungraded piles and stood up from his home office desk. He thought about leaving the other paper on his desk, but he couldn’t help but grab it and bring it with him. 

Dean read over the paper again while he was waiting for his food to cook. He read over it while he was eating his dinner. He read over it again before getting into the shower and twice more before crawling into bed that night. He needed to figure out who wrote this and what it meant. If he didn’t, it was going to drive him crazy. 

By the time he arrived at school the next morning, he had a plan. He was going to give his class an in-class assignment. Maybe someone would slip up and he would be able to match the handwriting to the paper. Maybe someone would write another one and he would be able to see who put the paper onto the stack. Fourth period could not come quick enough. 

“Alright class,” Dean stood up from his desk and moved around to lean against the front of it. He could see the entire class better when he was not sitting down. “I have some new assignments for the week. And before you start groaning, they are all in class. That means you will not have any homework for the rest of the week.”

“Nice,” Ash called from the back of the class. 

“Okay,” Dean stood up and began to walk between the desks, smiling at each student as he walked by. He was hoping to get something out of one of them but nothing seemed to stand out. “I am going to give you a subject at the beginning of class these next four days. All you have to do is write about it. But I want to feel it. I want to experience your experiences through your eyes.”

“What’s today’s subject?” Charlie, one of his most enthusiastic student’s asked. 

“I want you all to write about a time when you were truly angry,” Dean informed them. He knew this could be a tough subject, but he wanted them to really think and express their emotions. “What made you angry? Why did it make you angry? How did the situation play out? You can tell me as little or as much as you want, I know this won’t be easy, but I want to understand why you were angry when I am done reading them.”

Dean moved back to his desk while the students pulled out their pens and blank pieces of paper. Some students began to write immediately, while others seemed to sit back and think. Now all he had to do was wait and see if this was going to pay off. If it didn’t pay off today, he would give it the rest of the week. 

“Alright,” Dean called to the class from behind his desk where he was working to grade the papers from the night before. “You have five more minutes, then I want you to bring them up.”

Dean went back to his grading, stopping when he saw Charlie approach his desk with a stack of papers. Shit. Dean wanted each student to bring up their papers individually, but like a lot of times, Charlie elected herself to collect all the papers and bring them forward. Still, maybe there would be answers in today’s papers. 

“I’ll see you all tomorrow,” Dean said as the bell rang and students began to flee from the classroom.

Dean looked at the stack of papers on his desk. He could look through them now but then he would not be able to focus on the rest of his classes that day. Instead, he grabbed them all and put them in his bag. He would read them tonight when he got home, allowing him to give them the time that they needed. 

Throughout the rest of the day, Dean found himself looking at his bag, wondering if there were answers in it. He was not sure what the question was really. Was this some stupid assignment? Was he looking further into this than he really needed to? Would he figure out who the student was? What would he ever say to them if he figured out who they were?

“See you all tomorrow,” Dean told his last class as he quickly gathered his things. 

Most days, Dean would stay a while after school let out and get himself ready for the next day. Today, he just wanted to get home and look at the papers his fourth-period class turned in. 

Once home, Dean grabbed himself a beer and a bag of chips and made his way toward the couch. He normally went to his office but this was different. He knew he was a horrible teacher for saying this, but he was going to grade them all well. This was an assignment with his own personal agenda, no one's grade was going to suffer because of his curiosity. 

Dean started at the beginning. Even though he was looking for a certain paper, he was going to at least read over them. He always wanted to know more about his students so that he could better teach them. Sadly, the papers lacked. Most of them were times when they were angry at their parents for not allowing them to do something, all because they were not eighteen yet. It was a valid reason for them, but they all started to blur together because of it. Then he saw it; the same cursive handwriting from the day before. 

Dean set all the other papers down before giving the paper in his hands his full attention. Again, there was no name or title on the paper. It was shorter than all the rest and didn’t seem to match any of the other papers. That didn’t mean he wasn’t going to read it. 

_ You make me angry. I am so close to being out of this school and hopefully out of this town. I had no regrets and nothing holding me back from breaking free and disappearing from this life completely. But then you happened. It’s not like I hadn’t seen you a million times before, but for some reason, this year, you stood out. _

_ Do you know how aggravating it is to see you every day? Your green eyes, occasionally locking with mine, making every part of me tingle. TINGLE! You make me tingle, How fucking stupid is that really? Then you talk. You are so smart and kind and you always have a way of making everyone laugh. You aren’t allowed to be incredibly sexy and smart and funny, all at the same time.  _

_ So yeah, I am angry at you Mr. Winchester. Because I can’t have you. I will never have you. You will never know who I am. You will never want me as bad as I want you. And while that should make me sad, it doesn’t. It just pisses me off.  _

_ So, thanks for that.  _

“Who are you?”


	2. Chapter 2

The entire week, Dean tried to figure out who this student was but he was no closer than he was on Monday. None of the papers told Dean who it was and it was starting to frustrate him. On Tuesday, the mysterious student told Dean how angry he was at him for being attractive. Wednesday, the same student told Dean that his favorite memory when Dean worked the dunk tank at the end of summer festival and smiled every time a student dunked him, telling them how proud he was at their great aim. Thursday, Dean learned that the student’s favorite holiday was Halloween because you could pretend to be someone you aren’t and they got to pretend that they were someone Dean could be with. On Friday, Dean told them they didn’t have to write anymore papers. They got to use the class time to catch up on other classes. 

 

“Okay,” Dean walked to the front of his desk a few minutes before the bell was scheduled to ring and the students would be free for a whole week of spring break. “I know you all still have your final paper for the year that you are working on. I know realistically, most of you aren’t going to do any school work during break, and I don’t blame you, I wouldn’t either. That being said, I know that a few of you are going to be working on your bigger assignments. If you have any problems at all, feel free to email me. I will be on vacation with my family but I have written my personal email on the board. Email me, day or night, with any questions.”

 

“You are going to get so much spam,” Ash laughed, high fiving Jo, who was sitting next to him. 

 

“I am aware of this,” Dean laughed. “Good thing I have a sense of humor and complete control over the grade you get at the end of the year.”   
  
“Burn,” Charlie stuck her tongue out at Ash.

 

Before Dean could say anything else, the bell rang and students were out of their seats and flooding out into the hallways. Dean looked back at the board as the last student exited his class, his email boldly written. This was his last chance. 

_____

 

Dean was on a plane only hours after school got out. He was headed back to Kansas to spend some time with his mom. After his father had passed away the year before, he tried to go home as often as possible to see her. She told him that she was doing well and he didn’t need to, but he wanted to. He wanted to do all the things for her that she couldn’t do or wouldn’t ask for help with, like changing light bulbs and taking care of random leaks in the house. 

 

Once on the plane, Dean hook his computer up to the wifi, which would suck but it was better than nothing, and then settled in. He figured he could watch a movie or catch up on some more school work. That was when he noticed the alert on the bottom of the screen, letting him know he had three new emails. Dean thought about ignoring them, but he couldn’t. What if the student had messaged him. 

 

**Mills, Jody** End of year festival. 4:55 pm

 

Dean knew that she was going to ask him to be in the dunk tank again. He would gladly say yes but it was an email that could wait for another time. 

 

**Salliemae** Notice of scheduled payments. 4:32 pm

 

If this student didn’t end up being the death of him, school loans sure would be.

 

And then. 

 

**Spock, Captain** Hello Mr. Winchester. 4:02 pm

 

Dean laughed at the name but swallowed hard when it saw the subject line. It was obviously the first of many jokes that were going to be played on him during his vacation. It was probably Ash, or judging by the nerdy context, it could very well be Charlie. Dean thought about putting it off until later, but curiosity once again got the best of him. 

 

_ I never really thought I would be doing this. At first, I wasn’t going to. But then I realized, you can make up all kinds of things on the internet. I don’t have to use my real and you never have to know who I am. But this way, maybe I can talk to you, even if just once. So, if you are interested in hearing what I have to say, let me know.  _

 

Dean knew that he shouldn’t respond. He did not need for things to get out of hand. This was something that could possibly get him into trouble. But, he needed to know. He really needed to know. So, without overthinking it, Dean clicked reply. 

 

_ I am not really sure why I am doing this. Do you know why I am doing this? No, of course not. I guess I am curious. Do you possibly have messenger? We could have a real conversation. I would very much be interested in hearing what you have to say, even if it is just to clear some things up.  _

 

_ Dean. Or Mr. Winchester if you prefer.  _

 

_ P.S. My IM is ImpalaRock67 _

 

Dean read over the email a few times. He thought about deleting it but he didn’t have that kind of control. Finally, he pressed send. Now all he had to do was wait. Fortunately, he didn’t have to wait long. Not even five minutes had passed before his instant messenger alerted him that he had a new message. 

 

**Captain.spock.333:** Hello, Dean. It’s okay that I call you Dean, right?

**Impalarock67:** Yes, that is fine. And what do I call you?

**Captain.spock.333:** I guess you could call me Captain, or Spock even.

**Impalarock67:** That seems a little impersonal. But, Spock it is. 

**Captain.spock.333:** Thank you. 

**Captain.spock.333:** I can’t believe you actually responded to me. 

**Impalarock67:** Well, honestly, I was kind of hoping you would email me. It was my last idea.

**Captain.spock.333:** Your last idea? What was your last idea?

**Impalarock67:** Giving them entire class my personal email. I kind of hoped you would message me.

**Captain.Spock.333:** What was your first idea?

**Impalarock67:** Making you all write a bunch of assignments, hoping you would slip up and give away your identity. 

**Captain.spock.333:** I am much smarter than that. 

**Impalarock67:** I can see that. 

**Impalarock67:** Can you give me any information about you at all?

**Captain.spock.333:** Maybe. I guess you can ask. I may answer, I may tell you no.

**Impalarock67:** I can live with that. For now. 

**Impalarock67:** Are you male or female?

**Captain.spock.333:** Would either of those make you stop talking to me?

**Impalarock67:** No.

**Captain.spock.333:** Then male. 

**Impalarock67:** And why did you write those papers to me?

**Captain.spock.333:** I thought that was kind of obvious. 

**Captain.spock.333:** I think you are cute and I would really like to get to know you.

**Impalarock67:** I am your teacher.

**Captain.spock.333:** So, that means we can’t get to know each other.

**Impalarock67:** Maybe. I don’t know. I guess not. 

Dean could not believe he was doing this. 

 

**Impalarock67:** What would you like to know?


	3. Chapter 3

Dean wished he could say that he ended the conversation after the first one. But school had been back in session for a month and he was still talking to the mysterious student. They talked for hours every night. Dean wanted to tell him they couldn’t talk anymore but he couldn’t do that. He liked this guy, student or not. 

 

_ You are going to hell. _

 

_ You are going to lose your job. _

 

Dean knew all of this was a bad idea but he couldn’t stop. They were just talking … at first. Soon, getting to know each other turned into personal details about themselves. Before he knew it, they were talking in a way in which a student and teacher should not be talking. Dean had yelled at himself internally a few times after a steamy chat session left him breathless and in desperate need of a shower. 

 

_ You are definitely going to hell.  _

 

**Captain.spock.333:** Hey.

**Impalarock67:** Hey.

**Captain.spock.333:** What are you doing?

**Impalarock67:** Watching some cheesy movie on tv. Wishing you were here to watch it with me.

**Captain.spock.333:** We need to talk about something. 

 

Dean sat up on his couch, gripping his phone in his hand. This could be good or it could be bad. Though, even if it were good, it could still end up being very bad. 

 

**Impalarock67:** What’s going on?

**Captain.spock.333:** My family is moving away.

**Impalarock67:** What? When?

**Captain.cpock.333:** A week. My dad got a new job, a really good one. He couldn’t say no.

**Impalarock67:** Do you have to go with them? 

**Impalarock67:** You are almost done with your senior year. You can’t leave now.

**Captain.spock.333:** My mom found a way for me to finish all my classes online.

**Impalarock67:** There is no way you can stay?

**Captain.spock.333:** We have no other family in the area. 

**Captain.spock.333:** It’s a great opportunity for my dad.

**Captain.spock.333:** But that is not the hard part in all this. 

**Impalarock67:** What is the hard part?

**Captain.spock.333:** I have to say goodbye to you.

**Impalarock67:** We can still talk. I mean, that is all we do now anyways.

**Captain.spock.333:** I am going to delete my account.

**Impalarock67:** What? Why? 

**Captain.spock.333:** Because I can’t do this anymore.

**Impalarock67:** You can’t talk to me anymore?

**Captain.spock.333:** No. I can’t keep pretending that i am not in love with you.

**Captain.spock.333:** I need to let you go. Move on. I can’t be happy somewhere else if I am holding on to you. 

**Impalarock67:** You can’t do this to me. 

**Captain.spock.333:** It’s all going to work out. I am just happy I got to know you. 

**Impalarock67:** Meet me. In person. Meet me somewhere. It can be public if you want.

**Captain.spock.333:** I don’t think that is such a good idea.

**Impalarock67:** What have you got to lose? Really?

**Captain.spock.333:** You.

**Impalarock67:**  You are already losing me. So, really, what do you have to lose?

**Captain.spock.333:** The image you have of me. 

**Impalarock67:** I love you. 

**Captain.spock.333:** Don’t say that. You don’t mean it.

**Impalarock67:** You don’t get to tell me what I mean anymore. 

**Impalarock67:** Do you know where Hangman’s Bluff is?

**Captain.spock.333:** Yeah. Why?

**Impalarock67:** I am going to be there. Tomorrow night. 7pm. 

**Captain.spock.333:** Why are you telling me this?

**Impalarock67:** You are going to meet me there.

**Captain.spock.333:** And what if I don’t?

**Impalarock67:** Then I guess I will know if you love me back.

**Captain.spock.333:** That is not fair. 

**Impalarock67:** I am getting off here. I won’t be back on. I guess I will see you if I see you.

 

Dean logged off.

_____

 

Dean felt horrible. He didn't mean to make this difficult. He couldn't force someone to meet him, love him, or give anything up for him. If C, that is what he called the student, short for captain, wanted to let him go so he could live his life, Dean  needed to let him. But he was selfish and as stupid as it was, he was in love. 

 

They had only been talking for a little over a month, but it was constant. From the time he got up in the morning, until he went to bed at night, they were talking. The only time they didn't talk was during his fourth period class. He tried, but still, he couldn't get a response. The kid was good at hiding, Dean had to hand it to him.

 

So, maybe this was mean, but it was the last chance he had. Even if they were only meeting to say goodbye, Dean needed to see him, know who had stolen his heart. He risked everything talking to this guy; didn't he deserve some answers? 

 

Dean headed home after work, tossing aside all his grading and getting ready for the evening. It's possible that C doesn't show up and all this effort will be for nothing. But, on the chance that he shows, Dean wanted to make sure he looked good. 

 

It was silly really. C had seen Dean a million times. He had seen him on days when he put effort into his appearance and on days when the school was lucky he put on clean clothes. He knew what he was getting; Dean, on the other hand, was going in blind. Sorta.

 

Dean knew who this was. He had met this kid and seen him almost every day. But he tried hard not to pick who he thought it would be. He did not want to put a face to his mystery man, unless it was his actual face. 

 

Dean showered, shaved, put on some nice clothes and then downed a shot of whiskey. He didn't need to be drunk for this but he needed a little extra courage. He risked a lot with the relationship they had already, but this, if people found out, could end his career. 

 

Once he felt he could do this. Dean got into his Impala and headed the two miles out of town to Hangman's Bluff. Even though he wasn't religious, he prayed to whoever was listening that no one else would be there. It was a Tuesday night, not prime date night. 

 

There must be a a God. When Dean finally pulled in, it was completely empty. The sun was just starting to set and it was perfect. If Dean wasn't so nervous and this didn't have the potential to go badly, this would be the perfect spot for a first date. 

 

Dean killed the engine and got out of the car. He was sure he would be noticeable, but sitting in his car waiting almost felt creepy. He moved around to the back of the car and leaned against it. All he had to do now was wait.


	4. Chapter 4

Dean checked his watch for the tenth time. It was only 7:30. He had said he would be here by 7 but he was going to give it until 8. If he didn't show up by 8, Dean would get back into his car and head to the bar. Hell, he was dressed to impress. So, he was going to impress someone tonight, even if it wasn't the person he was hoping for. 

 

By time 7:50 rolled around, Dean decided this was not going to happen. He half understood but the other half of him was incredibly angry. How can someone tell you that they love you and then not even show up? Dean knew he was pressuring him into meeting him but still, it broke his heart a little. 

 

Dean pushed himself off of his car and walked around to the driver’s side door. Just as he was about to get in, Dean could hear a vehicle coming up behind him. Part of him got excited, but the logical part of him was sure it was a couple of teenagers who had come up here to make out in private.

 

Dean shook his head and climbed into his car. He had given up. Starting the engine, Dean went to put his car in reverse so that he could turn around, but the other car was directly behind him, the bright headlights shining in his rear view mirror. 

 

“Shit,” Dean muttered, turning off his car. 

 

Dean took a deep breath before getting out of his car once again. He shut the door but didn’t move. He waited for whoever was parked behind him, in the giant black truck, to make themselves known or to move out of his way so he could leave. 

 

The driver of the truck killed the engine but left their headlights on, making it hard for Dean to see whoever was stepping out of the vehicle. It all very very horror movie, like he should get into his car and lock the doors, but he couldn’t move. What if this was him? Dean needed for it to be him. 

 

“Hello, Dean.” 

 

Dean could make out the voice long before he saw the person. It was Castiel Novak. It was hard to mistake that voice. It was deep and raspy and Dean had always felt like it was the kind of voice that could make the boy money if he decided to use it to his advantage. Was he meeting Castiel Novak? Was Castiel who he had been talking to all along? He wanted to say that would disappoint him, but honestly, that was like winning the lottery after all of this. 

 

“Cas?” Dean asked, stepping forward until he could make out Castiel’s face. 

 

“Not what you expected right?”

 

“I didn't let myself expect anything,” Dean admitted. “Saved me from being embarrassed if I was wrong.”

 

“Oh,” Castiel looked around, clearly just as nervous as Dean was. 

 

“You want to maybe sit and talk?” 

 

“Yeah,” Castiel nodded. “I would like that. But, it’s kind of cold out here.”

 

“Yeah. I didn't really consider the weather.” Dean just thought about a secluded spot. “I can get my car warmed up and we can sit in there. If you want?”

 

“That will work,” Castiel smiled.

 

Dean climbed into his car, Castiel sliding himself into the passenger seat. It only took the impala a few minutes to warm up, since it wasn't that long ago that it was running. He then turned the middle vents toward Castiel. 

 

“I really don't know what to say,” Dean admitted. He knew he wanted this but at the same time, it was incredibly awkward.

 

“Yeah. It's kind of strange.”

 

“We should be able to do this,” Dean laughed. “We talked for hours every day.”

 

“Um.” Castiel looked around, his hands running nervously over his thighs. “Are you disappointed it's me?”

 

“What?” Dean was shocked. “Why would I be disappointed?”

 

“I know I am not the best looking guy around.”

 

“Bullshit.” Dean turned to face Castiel, one leg now bent up on the seat. “You're amazing. I am far from disappointed.” 

 

“I almost didn't come,” Castiel admitted. “I am leaving in a few days. It would have been easier to go with you not knowing who I was.”

 

“I'm glad you came though.”

 

“Really?” Castiel was doing his best to not make eye contact. 

 

“Of course.” Dean reached out and grabbed Castiel's hand, thankful that he didn't pull away. “I meant what I said.”

 

“About what?”

 

“Loving you.”

 

“I meant it too.” Castiel spoke quietly, finally bringing his eyes up to meet with Dean's. “But that doesn't change anything. I still have to leave.” 

 

“There aren't any other options?” 

 

“No,” Castiel shook his head. “I tried to find a way to stay but my mother feels this move will be good for me.”

 

“How is moving at the end of your senior year good for you?”

 

“I don't really have any friends or a social life,” Castiel sighed. “She thinks a fresh start might give me those things.”

 

“You have me,” Dean squeezed Castiel’s hand.

 

“I don't think my mother would find that as a reason for me to stay.”

 

“Yeah,” Dean sighed. “It would probably make her get you out of here sooner.”

 

“That's why we have to stop talking.” Castiel pulled his hand away. “It will be easier that way.”

 

“For who?”

 

Dean knew Castiel was moving away. He wasn't happy about it but it was happening. They could find a way to make it work. People have made long distance work before.

 

“I don't know.”

 

“We can still talk,” Dean suggested. “We can text and talk on the phone. We can try to make this work.”

 

“I don't want to try and make this work.” Castiel was on the verge of yelling. “Every day, it ate me up that I was so close to you and couldn't have you. If I am state's away and can't even see you, it'll kill me. It's too much. I can't do it.”

 

“Cas, please,” Dean begged.

 

“Goodbye, Dean.”

 

Castiel opened the door and climbed out. Dean knew he should let him go. He didn't want to make this situation worse. If he angered Castiel, it could cause him to report Dean. But none of that really seemed to matter considering Sea  was now chasing Castiel toward his truck.

 

“Cas, wait.”

 

“Just let me go.”

 

So Dean did. He let him go.


	5. Chapter 5

Dean drove home in silence. The windows were up and the radio was off. He was afraid if he let the outside world touch him, all of this would become reality; Castiel would be gone forever. 

 

Once home, Dean took off his clothes and got into the shower. He didn't need a shower but he always found it the best place to cry. If anyone was around or stopped by shortly after crying, he could always go straight to the soap in the eyes lie. It was the only way to cry growing up with his father. 

 

After a good forty minutes, Dean turned off the shower and grabbed a towel. He wasn't done crying but the water was done being hot. He would have to pick up where he left off in the morning. 

 

Heading to his room, Dean stopped when he heard a pounding sound. Of course, someone would choose now to show up at his place. His luck was clearly all out. 

 

Dean wrapped his towel tightly around his waist and made his way to the front door. Swinging it open, Dean took a deep breath, only to find that no one was there.

 

“What the?” Dean began to step out, only to be stopped by banging once again. It was coming from the kitchen.

 

Dean made his way into the kitchen, flicking on the light and looking around. 

 

“Cas?” Dean couldn't believe his eyes. Castiel was standing at his back door. 

 

Dean wanted to turn around and shut off the light. Castiel had made his feelings perfectly clear and the last thing he needed was his heart trampled on more. But it was Castiel. Dean couldn't walk away again; he didn't have it in him. 

 

“What are you doing here?” Dean asked as he opened the sliding glass door. 

 

“Can I come in?”

 

“Yeah,” Dean nodded. He stepped aside and let Castiel enter his kitchen. “Why did you come to the back door?”

 

“Figured there would be less of a chance of me being seen.”

 

“Okay,” Dean could agree with that. But that didn't answer his question. “What are you doing here, Cas?”

 

“I went home and I thought about everything that happened.” Castiel walked around his kitchen, looking around, while he talked. “And I realized how stupid I was being.”

 

“I …” 

 

Dean honestly had no idea what to say. Did he get happy and say that everything is okay? Was everything okay? How flighty was Castiel? Dean was not about to get his hopes up again just to be shot down. 

 

“We can talk,” Castiel said as he turned back to face Dean. “We will talk. Every day. I'm not ready to lose you. Are you ready to lose me?”

 

“Of course not.”

 

“Good.” Castiel smiled. “Can I see your house?”

 

“Uh.” Dean reached up and rubbed the back of his head, suddenly remembering that he was wearing nothing but a towel. “Sure. Can I go put some clothes on first?”

 

“No,” Castiel shook his head. “I like this tour guide outfit you have on now.” 

 

“It's very,” Dean looked down at the small towel wrapped around him. It didn't cover much, only the part he would need covered  “Revealing.”

 

“We could start with the bedroom.”

 

“Cas?”

 

“What?”

 

“Are you trying to get me in bed?”

 

“I was going to start with getting you out of that towel.” Castiel looked Dean over as he made his was over to stand in front of him. “If we happen to make it to the bed after that, then that is where we end up.”

 

“Are you sure about this?” Dean asked. Small alarms were going off in his mind, but if Castiel wanted this, he wasn't going to say no. Who knew when they would get this chance again. 

 

“Yes,” Castiel confirmed. “But I'm going to be completely honest with you. I've uh, I've never done this before.”

 

“How much have you done?”

 

“I've kissed someone,” Castiel admitted. “And I've used my own fingers on myself before. But, that's about it.”

 

“Okay,” Dean nodded. “Come with me.”

 

Dean grabbed Castiel’s hand and led him up the stairs and into his bathroom.

 

“Are we going to take a shower together?”

 

“Yes,” Dean confirmed. “Unless you would prefer not to.”

 

“No.” Castiel shook his head. “I want to.” 

 

Dean reached in and turned on the shower, hoping it had enough time to get some hot water back. He then turned back to face Castiel, reaching out to slide his fingers under the hem of his shirt. Castiel lifted his arms, giving Dean permission to remove it. 

 

Dean worked slowly to remove Castiel's clothes. He wanted to both take his time with him and also give him as many chances as he needed to back out. The last thing Dean was going to do was rush this. 

 

“You're shaking,” Castiel informed Dean.

 

“I'm nervous,” Dean admitted. 

 

“Why?” Castiel cocked his head to the side and Dean for a moment lost control of his knees. “Haven't you done this before?”

 

“It's been a long time since I've done this with someone I love.”

 

“Dean,” Castiel spoke, reaching over and grabbing Dean's chin so he could make him face him. “Get in the shower.”

 

“That's supposed to be my line,” he laughed. 

 

Dean didn't argue though. He dropped his towel, not missing the moment Castiel got the full look at him. He was a mixture of pleased and scared. Dean knew he was bigger than Castiel, but none of that mattered. Castiel was beautiful. 

 

Dean pulled Castiel into the shower, thankful when they were met with hot water. They stayed under the spray for a few moments, letting it cover their bodies. 

 

After a few moments, Dean grabs the soap and starts washing Castiel's body, slowly rubbing and massaging everywhere his hands could reach. He had already washed himself twice this evening, so he had all the time he needed to take care of Castiel. 

 

“Dean,” Castiel spoke, leaning himself back against him. 

 

“Yeah,” Dean asked. 

 

Dean was still shaking, even more so now that Castiel's naked body was pressed up against him. He had never wanted someone so badly. But, he knew if he didn't pace himself, he wouldn't be able to make this right for Castiel. 

 

“Why haven't you kissed me yet?”

 

“Would you believe that I'm scared to?”

 

“You are washing my naked body,” Cas laughed lightly, “but you are scared to kiss me?” 

 

“Yeah,” Dean sighed.

 

“Why?”

 

“Because if I kiss you,” Dean spoke as he turned Castiel around in his arms so they were facing each other, “I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to keep myself under control.”

 

“Dean.” Castiel moved forward again, their bodies connecting again. “I'd like you to kiss me now.” 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took so long to get posted. Sex scenes tend to take me a while. But, enjoy. Next chapter will be up later.

Dean hesitated slightly, before wrapping his arms around Cas and leaning down to capture his lips. He told himself to be soft and go slow, but all of that went out the window when Cas moaned against his lips. From that point, the kissing became frantic.

 

Dean grabbed Cas’ ass, pulling his up and pushing him against the wall. Cas wrapped his legs around Dean,  forcing him to moan as his cock was now pressing agasint the ass he so badly wanted to be inside of. 

 

“Cold,” Castiel said against Dean’s mouth.

 

“Sorry,” Dean laughed. 

 

Dean set Castiel down onto his feet and reached to turn the water off. Not enough hot water had regenerated to allow for as much fun as they could have in the shower. They could save it for another time; assuming there would be another time. 

 

Grabbing a couple towels, Dean dried Castiel off before drying himself off. He then picked up Castiel and carried him to his room, putting him into the bed. 

 

Dean stood at the end of the bed, looking over the man he loved laid out on his bed. It had been a very long time since someone had been in his bed and none that had ever made him this nervous. Castiel was different then all the rest. 

 

“What?” Castiel asked up to him.

 

“You’re beautiful,” Dean almost whispered. He had never really called another man beautiful to his face. It was a strange feeling but the words were true. Castiel was truly beautiful. 

 

Castiel put his arm over his eyes, but Dean could see the blush creep from his face and down his neck. Dean was just as sure that no one had ever called him beautiful before. 

 

Dean kneels down onto the bed, his fingers ghosting over Castiel’s feet, which he quickly learns are quite ticklish. 

 

Slowly, Dean leaned forward and kissed lightly at Castiel's ankle before trailing kisses up his legs, to his stomach, his chest, his neck, until finally slotting himself between Castiel’s legs and kissing him, soft but quickly growing frantic. Dean couldn't get enough and from the noises Castiel was making, neither could he. 

 

Dean begins to make his way back down Castiel’s body, taking time to kiss, lick and occasionally nibble over little piece of skin. 

 

When Dean found himself between Castiel’s legs again, he stopped, taking in the sight before him. Castiel truly was beautiful and Dean wasn’t sure what he had done to deserve this. 

 

“You’re killing me,” Castiel breathed out, causing Dean to laugh.

 

“Patience,” Dean smiled up at him.

 

“I’ve never really been good with …” 

 

Before Castiel could finish his sentence, Dean bit at the skin on his inner thigh, rubbing his stubbled face against Castiel’s cock. Castiel let out of moan, spreading his legs wider, inviting Dean to do whatever he pleased. 

 

A few more little bites and Dean turned them into light kisses against his skin as he made his way up the length of Castiel’s cock. Once he reached the head, Dean slipped it into his mouth, sucking lightly.

 

“Oh, god,” Castiel cried out.

 

“Mmm,” Dean moaned around the tip of Castiel’s cock.

 

Dean took his time with Castiel, licking his way down the shaft and then back up to the tip. Castiel was squirming beneath him, coming apart in the most beautiful of ways. Dean could have him like this forever, but he knew what Castiel wanted, and he wanted it badly as well. 

 

“Dean,” Castiel reached down, grabbing Dean’s hair between his fingers. “I am not going to last.”

 

That was just what Dean wanted. 

 

Dean slipped Castiel’s cock into his mouth, taking it all the way in and then pulling back to the tip. With each pass of his cock, Dean would increase his speed and the amount of suction that he was using. It didn’t take long for Castiel to lose control and release into Dean’s mouth. 

 

“Dean,” Castiel cried out, his hips pushing up off the bed. 

 

Pulling off, Dean sat himself up between Castiel’s legs. He looked up at him, his eyes looking up at the ceiling as if it were the best thing he had ever looked at.

 

“Wow,” Castiel finally spoke, his eyes coming down to find Dean. 

 

“It gets better,” Dean promised, crawling himself off the bed. “Wait here.”

 

“Yeah,” Castiel laughed, “because I can move.”

 

Dean quickly made his way into the bathroom. It had been a while since he had company and he didn’t have anything stocked in his room. Running to the bathroom, Dean pulled open a drawer, pulling out of bottle of lube and a condom. He then quickly made his way back to Castiel, who was in the exact spot he had left him. 

 

“Hey,” Dean set the stuff down on the bed and then sat himself back between Castiel’s legs. “Are you sure you are up for more?”

 

“Please,” Castiel begged. 

 

Dean didn’t ask anymore questions.

 

“I am going to need you to get on your hands and knees,” Dean instructed. “Not because I don’t want to see your face but because it’s easier the first time.”

 

“Okay,” Castiel nodded, reaching up for Dean’s hand to help him up.

 

Dean helped Castiel into a sitting position, pulling him forward and kissing him softly. Castiel then sat himself up and turned around, holding himself up on his arms. 

 

“If it’s too much to hold yourself up,” Dean spoke as his ran his hands up Castiel’s legs until they were resting on his hips, “you can lay yourself against the pillow.”

 

“Okay,” Castiel answers, still holding himself up on his arms. 

 

Dean wasn’t sure what to do. He had done this his fair share of times, but never with someone who had never done it before. The last thing he needed to do was go about it all wrong and hurt him. 

 

Dean started slow. He lubed up his fingers with a laughable amount of lube, not wanting to take the chance of it not being enough and then massaged the tightened ring. Castiel pulled away occasionally and Dean let him, but he always pushed back when he was ready for more. Castiel got to be in complete control of this situation.

 

Once Dean felt he was ready, he slowly slid the tip of his finger into Castiel. Castiel let out a gruntled sound and tensed up, but he did not pull away. Dean waited for him to relax before pushing his finger in a little more. He continued this slowly, allowing for Castiel to relax around him before making any movements. 

 

It took a while, but soon, Dean was sliding his finger in and out of Castiel. His body was shaking and he stopped Dean occasionally when he needed a moment, but the longer he did it, the more Castiel seemed to enjoy it. After what felt like an eternity, Castiel begged Dean for more, told him that he was ready and that he needed it. Dean was happy to give him what he wanted. He slipped in a second finger, going just as slow and working at Castiel’s pace. This continued until Dean was working three fingers inside of him without any hesitation or stopping.

 

“I need,” Castiel tried to speak but words seemed to be a difficult thing for him at the moment. 

 

“I know baby,” Dean soothed him, running his free hand along Castiel’s spine. “I got you.”

 

Dean continued to open up Castiel while he worked open the condom and slid it on. Dean was achingly hard, already dripping with excitement. He wished Castiel could see what he was doing to him but there would be time for that later. 

 

Once Dean had the condom on, he again took an ungodly amount of lube and rubbed at his cock, making sure that it was more than ready. 

 

“Okay,” Dean sat himself up and lined himself against Castiel. “You tell me when and if I need to stop or if you need more time. Please, if it hurts, tell me. I don’t want to hurt you.”

 

“I promise.”

 

Dean pushed his cock up against Castiel’s ass, slowly letting the head slip in. Castiel made a sound Dean couldn’t figure out, causing him to stop. They stayed that way for a few moments, before Castiel pushed back against Dean, taking just a little more of him in before stopping again. Dean stood still. He was going to let Castiel control this all. Every time he was ready for more, he would push back against Dean. This continued until Dean was almost all the way inside of him. 

 

Once Castiel stopped moving, Dean pulled back, not all the way, just a few inches, before stopping. Castiel would then follow him, pushing himself back onto Dean each time. They did this slowly at first but soon, Dean could not hold back and picked up the pace. Castiel didn’t stop him. 

 

“Dean,” Castiel cried out, letting go of his arms and leaning himself against the pillow like Dean had told him he could do. This created a new angle for Dean, one that was about to send him over the edge, but he wanted Cas to come first. 

 

Dean turned his thrusts even and shallow, allowing for him to lay himself partially against Castiel. He wanted to be able to reach around and stroke Castiel’s cock. Once his hand hit the boys cock, his entire body tensed up and Castiel was crying out, coming all over the bed. The tightening around Dean’s cock had him seeing stars as he followed Castiel into his own orgasm. 

 

Dean laid against Castiel for a moment, allowing himself to start to soften before pulling out slowly and collapsing to the bed beside him. Castiel remained as he was, breathing hard. Dean had to reach over and grab him, pulling him down onto the bed so that he could wrap his arms around him. 

 

“Was that okay?” 

 

“Mmm,” Castiel managed to answer. 

 

“I am going to take that as a good sign.”

 

“Mmm hmm,” Castiel mumbled again. 

 

“You were amazing,” Dean informed him, leaning in to kiss him. 

 

“Really?” Castiel looked confused? “I didn’t do anything.”

 

“You did everything,” Dean promised. “You did everything.”


	7. Chapter 7

“Hey, Bobby,” Dean knew that he was taking a big chance by doing this but he honestly felt like he didn’t have any other options. “How are you?” 

 

“I am good, boy,” Bobby answered into the phone. “Long time no talk.”

 

“I know,” Dean felt bad for not calling the man, who practically raised him, more than the did. “But I am hoping to change all of that.”

 

Dean spent the next hour lying. He felt bad about it but he wasn’t ready to come out and tell anyone the truth just yet. Castiel had moved out to California and Dean needed to find a way to get to him. Bobby and his brother both lived out in California and Dean decided that it was a change he was willing to make. He asked Bobby, who was the principal of a school out there if they were looking for any new teachers. Dean was now officially going to be teaching fourth grade next year. It was going to be a change, but a change he was ready to make. 

______

 

**Dean:** What are you doing right now?

**Castiel:** Working on some stuff for school. 

**Castiel:** I should have waited until fall to start school. 

**Dean:** I am sure you are doing great. 

**Castiel:** Thanks. What are you doing?

**Dean:** Playing a game. 

**Castiel:** What kind of game?

**Dean:** A treasure hunt of sorts. 

**Castiel:** What? Why? Where are you playing this game?

**Dean:** Want to play as well?

**Castiel:** No. I have a paper to writer, remember?

**Dean:**  Please? I’ll make it worth your while.

**Castiel:** Fine. What do I have to do?

**Dean:** First, I need you to tell me where you are exactly. 

**Castiel:** I am at Philz Coffee.

**Dean:** Okay. Give me five minutes. 

**Castiel:** Why? For what?

 

Dean grabbed his laptop really quick and looked up Philz coffee, making sure he knew exactly where it was before continuing on with Castiel. 

 

**Castiel:** Dean, what is going on?

**Dean:** Okay. I am ready. Are you ready baby?

**Castiel:** Well, when you talk to me like that, how can I say no?

**Dean:** Good. Your first task on the hunt is to pack up your stuff you have with me.

**Castiel:** Dean. I really do need to get this done.

**Dean:** And you will, after. I promise. I will even help you out.

**Castiel:** Fine. Packing up stuff now.

**Dean:** Awesome. Let me know when you are ready to continue.

**Castiel:** Okay. I am all packed up. What now?

**Dean:** Okay. Go out to the front of the coffee shop.

**Castiel:** Seriously?

**Dean:** Just do it baby, please?

**Castiel:** Fine. I am walking out the door right now. 

**Castiel:** Would this be easier if I called you?

**Dean:** We can do it that way if you would like. 

 

Dean’s phone began to ring not long after he had sent his last text. He hadn’t planned on doing this over the phone, at least not verbally, but this would work just as well. 

 

“Hey baby,” Dean answered, trying to hide the nervousness in his voice. 

 

“Hey,” Castiel sounded curious. Dean liked that. “What is going on?” 

 

“Same thing. I am going to give you instructions and you are going to follow them.”

 

“For what purpose?” 

 

“To get to your treasure,” Dean reminded him. 

 

“Right. Treasure.” 

 

“Are you ready for more?” Dean asked. 

 

“Let’s do this.”

 

“Okay,” Dean looked down at his computer. “I want you to go left and follow the road for three blocked until you get to Westland Road.”

 

“Westland Road,” Castiel repeated to himself. “Where am I going?” 

 

“It would be less exciting if I just told you,” Dean laughed. “Just let me know when you are there.”

 

“Fine,” Castiel huffed and then went silent, only the sound of his breathing coming over the line. “I’m here.”

 

“Excellent.” Dean could feel the excitement building inside of him. “Now, take a right, go two more blocks down to Fisk.” 

 

“How do you know all of these roads?” 

 

“Google maps,” Dean answered honestly. He wouldn’t be able to do this without the help of the internet. 

 

“You are something else,” Castiel laughed. “But I am here.” 

 

“Wonderful,” Dean fidgeted in his seat, unsure if he would be able to keep himself under control. “You are getting so close.”

 

“To what?” Castiel asked. “I am getting away from downtown. There is nothing but apartments and houses this way. Wait? Did you buy me a house or something?”

 

“Yes,” Dean answered with sarcasm. “Because I can afford to just buy you a house. I am a teacher.”

 

“Wishful thinking,” Castiel hummed. “Where to now treasure director?”

 

“This next one takes a while,” Dean informed him. “I want you to take a left and go about half a mile to Cherry Ave.” 

 

“Is this some sort of trick to get me to exercise?” 

 

“No,” Dean laughed again. “I already know that you do that. So this shouldn’t be too hard for you.” 

 

Dean and Castiel talked about the paper Castiel needed to write while he continued to walk. It was better than having a bunch of dead air between them. The talking help releave Dean of his nervousness, just a little. 

 

“Okay,” Castiel interrupted what Dean was about to say. “I am at Cherry Ave.” 

 

“Now I want you to look for the green apartment building,” Dean instructed him. “I believe it’s called Cherry Residential or something like that. I forget.” 

 

“Dean,” Castiel sounded serious. “Please tell me what is going on.” 

 

“Just let me know when you are there.”

 

“Fine.”    
  
Dean stood up from his computer and walked over to the window, looking down at the parking lot below. It took a few minutes, but soon, Castiel came into view. He looked amazing. Dean knew that he had missed him but actually seeing him made Dean want to run out and wrap his arms around him and never let him go again. 

 

“I am here.” 

 

“Okay,” Dean wiped his now sweaty palms along his jeans and walked over to his front door. “I left a gift for you at apartment 24A.” 

 

“Why would you do that?” Castiel asked. “Who do you know that lives here?”

 

“Just a very old friend of mine,” Dean answered. “I have kind of known the guy forever, so I trusted he would be able to get the gift to you.”

 

“Why didn’t you just send it to me?” 

 

“At your house?” Dean asked. “Where your parents live?”

 

“Good point,” Castiel laughed. “But you know I am eighteen right. There is nothing they could do to you.”

 

“Still,” Dean sighed. “This was safer.” 

 

“Your friend knows I am coming?” 

 

“Yes,” Dean answered. “He is waiting for you to arrive.”

 

“He isn’t going to kill me is he?” 

 

“Maybe,” Dean laughed. “If you ask just as many questions when you get there.”

 

“Whatever.” 

 

“Are you there yet?” Dean could feel his heart pounding away in his chest. 

 

“I am almost to the door,” Castiel informed him. “I am knocking now.”

 

Dean hung up the phone as soon as he heard the knock on the door. He had to fight back laughter when he heard Castiel saying his name, becoming aware that Dean was no longer on the line. 

 

Dean waited a moment, trying to calm himself before pulling open the door, coming face to face with Castiel. 

 

“Dean?” 

 

Without answering him, Dean pulled Castiel inside and shut the door, pushing his boyfriend against it, harder than he should have but he couldn’t help it. Dean needed to be against him, touching him, kissing him. 

 

“I missed you so much,” Dean spoke against Castiel’s ear as he worked his way to his neck. 

 

“Clothes Dean,” Castiel said, forcing Dean to pull back from confusion. 

 

“What?” 

 

“Why are we still wearing clothes?” 

 

“Oh,” Dean reached over and pulled at Castiel’s backpack dropping it to the ground before pulling at his shirt. “Sorry, how could I have not started with that?” 

 

“That’s what I was wondering.”

 

“Don’t you have a paper?” Dean asked, still working to strip Castiel of his clothes. 

 

“It can wait.” 


End file.
